Popular Ski-Fluencer's Career In Shambles After It's Discovered He's Been Skiing In Front Of Green Screen This Whole Time

In a discovery that rattled the mountain community, popular ski-fluencer, Flake McMittens, who frequently posted videos of himself free-skiing down some of the world’s toughest runs, was discovered to be skiing in front of a green screen this whole time.

During one of Flake’s live videos featuring him skiing down a world-renowned double black diamond, Helicopter Notch, a green curtain behind him came cascading down quicker than a rug pulled from under foot, revealing his videos were a farce of epic proportions.

“We were watching his live feed as he descended Heli Notch only to see him accidentally fall into a green screen, cutting the video, and revealing a window behind it with a view of Miami Beach,” said a stunned follower of Flake’s as they realized all of Flake’s videos of him swishing through powder were really just Flake in his kitchen.

Flake was quick to send a press release which was another doctored clip of himself “skiing” in the Swiss Alps, saying he was “out of the country on a pretty mondo ski trip and couldn’t address the accusations,” while it was clear this was another green-screen sham.

Flake was seen posting additional videos where he made it look like he was trekking through the Khumbu Icefall on Everest, saying he’ll be “out of the country a bit longer than expected as he’s also a mountaineer” and “is confident this’ll all blow over by the time he’s home in a few months.”

New Gear Alert: Goggles Already Come Pre-Fogged For Convenience

An innovative ski company has dropped its latest gear at the resort ski shop: a pair of goggles that comes with fog already emblazoned on the inside of the lens, saving riders the unpredictability of when goggle fog will strike.

“My goggles always fog up mid-run unexpectedly, but now that they come pre-fogged, it’s great. I don’t have to wonder when it’ll happen. I can just ski blind from the get-go,” said a skier as he excitedly lowered the goggles over his eyes before bumping into 15 people on the way to the lift.

“Skiers and boarders can breathe a sigh of relief knowing they no longer have to worry about being hit with foggy goggles halfway down a run,” said ski shop manager, Franz, “it’ll just be there the whole time, which I think is pretty awesome.”

Riders Stuck As Chair Taxis At Lift Platform Like Delayed Plane On A Runway

Riders were stuck upwards of 45 minutes at the lift platform dangling a foot off the ground as the lift taxied in place for upwards of an hour, as riders waited anxiously for lift traffic control to determine what the holdup was.

Frustrated riders called loved ones to complain, saying, “Why board us if they knew we’d be sitting here twiddling our thumbs, and they didn’t even come around with peanuts,” griped riders, as many vowed to never choose the Airlift Express again.

After 45 minutes, skiers were seen taking off into the air as the lift began moving, at which point riders all clapped in unison before the lift came to an abrupt halt when a skier wiped out on the loading platform behind them, delaying the riders indefinitely.

Riders are asked to call their travel agents to rearrange plans rather than dial the resort’s main line.